slowbob wrote this eulogy for me: I hope I never have to write your eulogy. If I must, I promise to rap it, "break it down" to NWA's "Straight Outta Compton" "Gonna miss Teaa! Crazy motherf#$#$ named J-Bird Gonna cry till police get me interred When I'm called on I get my sad on shoot the tears, soak the world like a tampon!"
totallyhot: to know the Teaa is to love the Teaa. anyone who doesn't follow this rule has their head up their bottom.
jaso: Ah, 1977. Who can forget it? Well, if you're like me, you can- because you were barely two years old. But I hear from sources close to 1977 that it was a gay old time. Leo Sayer's You Make Me Feel Like Dancing was tearing up the Billboard Charts. Movie buffs were lining up for the late show of some crazy experimental movie called Star Wars. And television’s The Waltons was enjoyed by...well, we're not really sure who liked The Waltons, or why.
But all of these events were of microscopic historical importance in comparison to what happened in Richmond, Virginia on November 21st of that same year, as Sharon Bradley steeled her nerves and brought tiny Teaa Suzanne into the world at 7:41pm Eastern Time.
For ages, the ancient prophets had...well...prophesized that this moment would come. And for a quarter century scientists, loved ones and heck, all of society have been studying this wondrous creature. Who knows what lies beneath the layers of too-cool-for-school clothing, the dirty blonde-no, pink-no, platinum blonde-no, black hair, that aura of overwhelming fun-ness, that aura of tantalizing sexuality?
Well, I do. Many do. For Teaa, above nearly everything else, is a giving and gracious friend. She's easy to get to know and (speaking from first-hand experience) refuses to take "maybe" for an answer. Resistance is useless.
So follow her down the long and winding road filled with muppets, converse, vegetarian food, and red celicas and I promise that at the end, you will have truly lived.
sapience: I highly recommend her for all of your making-life-a-better-place-to-live-in needs
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